“There’s no place like home for the holidays … ” or so goes the old, familiar holiday tune. Occasional visits home, especially during the holidays, may provide some disconcerting insight into the “secret lives of mom and dad.”

Hundreds of thousands of adult children return home to celebrate the holidays and family traditions with parents and siblings. For many it’s a joyful time, punctuated by those familiar things that make holidays extra special … the smells coming from the kitchen, the sounds of laughter and music, the vision of children at the “kid’s table” that you occupied in what seems not-so-long-ago.

And as wonderful as these holiday gatherings are, they often provide a quick dose of reality – these visits are often when it becomes increasingly evident that aging parents may be having some difficulty in their day-to-day living. Perhaps you notice an unusually large stack of unopened mail on a table; an unexplained “ding” in the car; an all-but-empty refrigerator or one in which food is well-past an expiration date. Tasks that were once second nature to parents suddenly may be difficult and consuming.

While it’s tempting to ignore the issues and blame them on “they’re just getting older” or a quirky memory lapse, experts in the field of eldercare all agree that proactively addressing the topic in a respectful, conversational way is a loving act.

Fortunately, there are numerous sources with information related to elderly parents, aging in place and resources that can provide assistance, including:

• CICOA Aging and In-Home Solutions offers a free home self-assessment to help you determine if it’s time to get help from outside sources.
• ICA Ambassador Barbara Boyd opened up her home for a walk-through safety assessment -- watch for some quick and helpful tips.